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Understanding the Ego and the True Self

"The ego is a veil between humans and God." – Rumi

Often, we attribute our speech and actions to our ego (Ahankara). The ego is that 'I' sense which dominates, hijacking the intellect and clouding our true self. In moments of reflection, we might find ourselves apologizing, acknowledging that we spoke or acted from an ego-driven place. Yet, upon further consideration, we realize that what we said or did was not aligned with our true nature. If it wasn’t the true 'me' who spoke or acted, then it’s essential to understand the root of this imbalance and address it.

In the Bhagavad Gita, Lord Krishna says: "It is the ego that causes us to act in ways that are out of alignment with our true nature." (Bhagavad Gita 3:42). While the mind, ego, and intellect are faculties within our operating system, it's important to remember that our true self empowers these faculties, often remaining passive or dormant. If we say, "My ego made me do that," we must ask: why was the self—the awareness or soul—passive in this moment? The answer lies in the fact that we weren’t acting through our awareness at that time. We allowed the ego to take over, influencing our actions.

Consider a moment when you’ve lashed out in anger, perhaps in an argument. The words spoken in that heat of the moment might not represent your true values and identity. Later, upon reflection, you realize the outburst came from your ego, not your true self. Recognizing this dissonance is the first step in regaining balance. If you truly want to shift from ego-driven actions, you must first identify this disconnect and take responsibility for it.

The self, or soul, is awareness. When we are connected to our true self, the mind, ego, and intellect will naturally align with it. Each of us is an individual, indivisible in nature. Our mind, ego, and intellect are not separate from the self; they need to be guided by it, reflecting our true nature. Without this guidance, the ego influences us according to false or assumed identities.

Take a moment to reflect: When was the last time you acted from a place of ego instead of awareness? Perhaps in a work meeting, you found yourself defending your position without truly listening to others. That defensive reaction was a product of the ego, not the true self. To realign, we need to pause and reconnect with our awareness before responding.

As individuals, we must take responsibility for our speech and actions because they reflect our character. The ego is not a separate entity; it is part of our individuality. Therefore, we must own its influence and its outcomes. If our thoughts, words, and actions are misaligned with our true self, it’s our responsibility to realign them through mindfulness and awareness.

To start realigning your thoughts and actions with your true self, begin with small moments of mindfulness. For example, before responding in a conversation or making a decision, take a few deep breaths to center yourself. Ask, ‘Is this response in line with my true values?’ This pause gives you the space to act from awareness rather than ego.

Furthermore, practice observing your emotions. When we experience anger, jealousy, or fear, it’s easy to act impulsively. However, by acknowledging these emotions without judgment, we can prevent them from hijacking our actions. Observing our feelings as they arise gives us the ability to shift back into awareness and regain control.

Compassion is key in this process—not just toward others, but also toward ourselves. When we recognize that we’ve acted from ego, it’s easy to fall into self-criticism. But by showing ourselves compassion, we can gently bring ourselves back into alignment without guilt or shame. Remember, the goal isn’t perfection, but progress.

In many spiritual traditions, practices like meditation, prayer, or chanting help quiet the mind and strengthen the connection to the true self. Through consistent practice, you cultivate the awareness necessary to recognize when the ego is at play and realign yourself with your higher nature. Meditation, in particular, can serve as a powerful tool to center the mind and reconnect with the self, helping to realign your thoughts, words, and actions with your true essence.

Our mind, intellect, and ego are not distinct from us; they are expressions of our identity, shaping our character through our actions. These faculties are tools and instruments of our soul. As individuals, we are integrated with them. “When the mind is in harmony with the self, there is no separation between thought and action.” – Swami Sivananda. Since individuality is indivisible, there cannot be two conflicting identities within one person: one true to the self, and the other clouded by the ego.

Through mindfulness and discipline (sadhana), we must live as one integrated being. What we project—through our words and actions—is a reflection of our true identity. This projection should be in conscious alignment with our core, reflecting our true character. The process starts with the mind. Our thoughts must first align with the self, followed by the regulation of the ego to inspire and motivate us to act. The intellect serves as the medium, monitoring and moderating our actions, ensuring they are aligned with our true essence.

This mindful, conscious process will eliminate the imbalance between our true identity and our actions, bringing us into greater harmony with who we truly are. It is through the continuous practice of mindfulness, compassion, and spiritual discipline that we realign ourselves with our true nature, allowing us to live with integrity and authenticity.

Take a moment today to reflect: How can you bring more mindfulness into your daily life to ensure your actions are aligned with your true self? The journey of self-awareness and alignment is ongoing—start small, stay consistent, and watch your true nature unfold.



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